Human Sized Portions

Posted on November 28, 2013 by jimtheyouthguy

Lounging in the post Thanksgiving meal glow.  2 Football games down with one more to go.  I made the commitment this year.  I’m not going to overeat.  I’m not going to overeat.

They say portioning is the key:

  • six ounces of meat (about the size of a pack of cards)
  • 1/2 cup of your sides (about the size of a tennis ball)
  • 1 slice of bread (the size of a cassette tape)
  • 1 slice of pie (deck of cards again)
  • ice cream (size of a lightbule)

I did pretty good.

  1. six ounces of turkey
  2. six ounces of ham
  3. 1/2 cup of mashed potatoes
  4. 1/2 cup of sweet potatoes
  5. 1 dinner roll
  6. 1/2 cup of stuffing
  7. Repeat All – except sweet potatoes
  8. 1 slice of pumpkin pie (yeah, this was a bit more than a deck of cards (quite a bit more))
  9. 1/2 cup of homemade whipped cream (don’t know the right portion size here)

Apparently there is more to this than just human sized portions.

oooooooofff.

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First Is Worst

Posted on November 27, 2013 by jimtheyouthguy

It was different with mom than it was with dad.  The loss of Dad was a continuous ache, a persistent feeling that something was missing.  With mom, it was all about the “firsts”.

Every “first” drove a spike into a new place in my soul.

Obviously, that includes holidays, birthdays and anniversaries, but also the birth of my youngest child, my ordination, graduations, now an upcoming wedding – all the things that I know would be meaningful to her.  It’s like they aren’t quite complete, because they can’t be shared with her.

I read on a church sign awhile back, “A sorrow shared is halved.  A joy shared is doubled.”  I think that is especially true with my mom.  It was a joy to see her enjoyment/pride/love in whatever the celebration.  There was no “doubling”.  It was like a 2-liter of soda opened yesterday.  It was good – just a little flat.

I’ve been through all my “first” Christmas, Thanksgiving, Easter, Mother’s Day, birthdays (mine and hers), etc. eleven times over now.  There can be an occasional twinge, but they are rare.  But every now and then, there is a new first.  Those can sting a little.

It’s probably a little weird to think of Chicago’s “Hard Habit to Break” when you are talking about your mom, but a couple of phrases really say it well:

You don’t know what you’ve got
Until it’s gone
And I found out a little too late . . .
Now being without you takes a lot of getting used to
I should learn to live with it
But I don’t want to . . .

A little farther on we get, “Instead of getting any easier, it’s the hardest thing to take.”  That part’s not true (probably wasn’t true of the romantic interest being sung about either for that matter).  As time goes on, the Sorrow diminishes.  The painful moments are not as painful and begin to be further apart.  It does take some getting used to and we learn to live with it whether we want to or not.

I’m glad that I don’t have to mourn as those who have not hope (1 Thes 4:13-18).  I’m also glad that when Jesus began His ministry, He declared His fulfillment of Isaiah 61.  That he came that broken hearts could be bound up and the favorable year of the Lord proclaimed is a great comfort to me.  Especially when I realize that His ministry continues even to this day!

If we decide that there will always be a hole in our soul, then there will be.  Or we can choose healing.  I choose to heal.

Mom would like that.

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You Don’t Know What You’ve Got Until It’s Gone – and I found out a little too late

Posted on November 27, 2013 by jimtheyouthguy

Lost

I was recently visiting someone in jail.  She was fighting depression.  I know the instant reaction, “Yeah, I’d be depressed if I was sitting in jail!”  But, it was more than that.  Having sat in jail for over 7 months, she had come to terms with that aspect of her life.  Besides, it was only a few days to her release to a residential drug treatment program.  Things were actually looking up, but, she was still down.

It didn’t take long to get to the issue – Thanksgiving and the holidays.

So many lost family times.  So many lost experiences.  So many lost relationships.  So many lost moments.

Lostness

Because of holiday traditions that revolve around family gatherings, this time of year really accentuates every little moment/relationship/experience lost.  They also have a tendency to give us plenty of time to ruminate, to really investigate every bit of pain, inequity, failing, mistake, etc.  It is really easy to get lost in the Darkness.

My friend was feeling this “lostness”.  It is so much more than the individual events or relationships.  It becomes this feeling that nothing will ever be right again; that the losses had piled up into an emotional debt load that was insurmountable.  Then it moves from feeling lost to being lost – as in lost incarnate.  Not just a temporary condition, but a state of being that can never be wiped off the slate of the soul.

Loss

Yes, the events of the past will never change.  The times lost now cannot be recovered.  But, it won’t always be this way.  Or, at least, it doesn’t have to be.

We do not mourn today as those who have not hope.  (Okay, yes, I know, that passage is specifically about death, but there is a greater principle at work here as well.)  As long as we have breath, we have an opportunity to make new choices.  As we chose to live life with love and integrity, things begin to change.  We can find Peace, Love and Joy.  Even though they may feel a million miles away at the moment, we know they will be back.  We hope.

Hope

When we live with the hope that Love, Joy and Peace are real and that we can and will experience them again one day, suddenly pain and sorrow become bearable.  The Darkness lifts and the Sorrow is a little less moment by moment until it is just a shadow of sadness somewhere “back there”.

Hope becomes the promise of spring in the midst of winter.  In the darkest, coldest, barren times, we know spring is coming.

And that’s enough.

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My Tacloban Experience: Part 2 of 4

Posted on November 26, 2013 by jimtheyouthguy

First hand experience of the devastation in the Philippines. This is from friends serving with KIM (Kid’s International Ministries) near Manilla. Consider how you might support these relief efforts.

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